One of your biggest concerns about your divorce is likely how your children will react. You may worry about how your children will cope, especially as you start to share parenting time with your former spouse.
According to the American Psychological Association, approximately 40 to 50% of marriages in the U.S. end in divorce, and many of these couples have to learn how to coparent. As you get used to sharing custody with your ex, these tips can help you maintain a successful coparenting arrangement.
1. Focus on your children
After your divorce, you may feel hurt, angry and disappointed. But you should try and separate these feelings from your coparenting relationship so you can cooperate effectively with your former spouse to parent your children.
2. Communicate with your coparent
Even if you do not want to talk to your ex very often, set aside a regular time to speak with him or her about your children. Figure out what works well for your arrangement, whether that is weekly in-person meetings or a daily text about your children.
3. Maintain similar routines
Having a similar routine at both households can help your children feel more secure. These can include routines for bedtime, homework, screen time and discipline.
Learning to coparent with your ex successfully will likely take time and effort and will not happen immediately after your get divorced. As you focus on communicating consistently and putting your children’s needs first, managing this arrangement with your former spouse will likely get easier.