The decision to divorce is often the culmination of events and circumstances that make marriage untenable. In California, couples can divorce due to irreconcilable differences or incapacity.
Although California law does not emphasize why spouses choose to divorce, most marriages end due to these three common causes
1. Destructive behavior
Sometimes one spouse’s behavior makes staying in the marriage unbearable for the other. For example, a physically or emotionally abusive partner could leave the other mistrustful and fearful. Also, one spouse’s addiction to alcohol, drugs, pornography, gambling and other detrimental behaviors can lead to criminal activity, arrest or adultery that erodes marital trust. In addition, destructive behavior can promote an unsafe environment for a couple’s children, inspiring one spouse to put their minors’ interests ahead of their marriage.
Most successful marriages rest on a foundation of core beliefs and life outlooks that spouses share. Although many marriage counselors promote differences that can benefit a long-term relationship, partners who do not share expectations regarding finances, children, religion, and education cannot plan a satisfying future together.
3. Lack of communication
Many couples will site growing apart as the primary cause of their divorce. This reason is usually a catchall phrase to indicate that the parties no longer communicate regularly, spend time together, empathize with each other or have physical or emotional intimacy. Although many people choose to be non-communicative due to fear of rejection or hearing something that makes them uncomfortable, a failure to communicate effectively is a leading cause of divorce.
The state of California does not need to know why you are seeking a divorce, but thoroughly understanding your unique circumstances will ensure your settlement protects your future interests.